• Conquering Fears

    Skydiving

    It’s official.. in the next month I will get to check two things off my bucket list.

     

    The first, run a half marathon. Training is going great and I will for sure cross the finish line!! (More on this later)

     

    The second thing and point of this post is….. SKYDIVING! Yes, you read that right. I am going skydiving.

     

    This is a true test to the fact that I am an adrenaline/adventure junkie as I really do not like heights. However, the thought of jumping out of an airplane  12,000 feet up in the air makes me so excited I want to squeal!! It is my early birthday gift to myself. In celebration of living 25 years and because from the looks of it, year 25 will be rang in single, I am embracing life to its fullest and doing something I have always wanted to do.  I mean, I have to keep life exciting as I am no longer planning trips to Bali to ride elephants or snorkeling the Great Barrier Reef on my Spring break. Ahh.. the life I have lived!

    Life is great and I am so in love with it!! 🙂

  • Uncategorized

    Poor and Humbly

    Humbly You Came/To the earth You created/All for love’s sake became poor*

     

    Name that song.  If you grew up in church, I bet you could not only name it, but sing the rest of it from memory. I will admit, I am not a big fan of the song because it has been so over-sung in our churches. But last night, as I sang the words of the song, I was overwhelmed by the weight of those words. What does it really mean that the light of the world came to earth? And how did He come?

     

    Poor and Humbly.

     

    Not in a flash of lights. Not broadcasting to the world how great He was. Not in a fancy car.  The Savior of the universe, my Jesus, was born in a stable to a family we would consider impoverished. He went mostly unnoticed for the first part of His life, and finally started making the news by.. feeding the hungry, healing the sick, and helping the broken.  How drastically different a picture then the one painted in our churches today.  I mean, sure we will sing a song about how He came to earth and how high the price was that He had to pay for our sin, but in that same breath we will complain about the lights or the sound or the chairs. We have become a people so consumed with our own lives that we are perhaps, dare I say, unwilling to even consider that perhaps Christ came not simply to save us from hell, but to teach us a better way to live here and now. He set an example of love, humility, and graciousness. He was poor and lowly by earthly standards.

     

    This is something I have struggled with for a long time now. How do we reconcile the life Christ lived with the consumerist nature of society and the church? And if we choose to instead, just seek Christ and attempt to live as He lived, how do we do so without everyone thinking we are weird? But perhaps those are the wrong questions to ask. Perhaps the bigger question is, how can we afford not to? Our example is Christ. And I have a strong feeling if Christ came back today, He would walk into our church buildings and start turning tables over.  That is if we even let Him through the doors. Perhaps His lowly appearance, unwashed hair, and dirty feet might be reason to not allow Him through the doors. Perhaps we would be too busy making sure the lights were right, the music was timed correctly, and the atmosphere was inviting.  Perhaps we would be too busy with ourselves, with our friends, with our group that we would fail to see the visitor silently entering through our doors. Perhaps we are too caught up in church arguments, who said what, who goes where, and how much I can promote my own building (note I say building because we aren’t promoting the body of Christ or the church when we simply promote our place of worship). 

     

    Beyond those things, I wonder how as the American church we have decided that big buildings are acceptable, that fancy cars are a wise use of our money, and that houses that boast of our wealth are ok because they are simply an outpouring of God’s blessing. Perhaps God blessed us in order that we may use our funds to “live simply so others may simply live.”  When I would argue that more of the body of Christ is living in poverty, then living in excess, why the need for more, more, more?  Can we take a step back and truly listen to the words we sing? Can we stop for a moment and think of the gravity of Christ’s life? And in doing so, can we truly evaluate our own lives against that standard? I am guilty so often as charged. I am not claiming for a second that I do not struggle with the desire to want more, to spend more, to have things a certain way. But I am committing to following Jesus regardless of how “weird” that may make me in the eyes of those around me.  So I ask you, today, this week, what can you do to live more like the Jesus who came to the world poor and humbly? What change can you make in your actions, in your words, in your spending habits to reflect a life modeled after the One who gave it all?

     

     

    *Light of the World by Chris Tomlin

  • Life Inspiration

    Restless at Heart

    Most people probably have mixed and perhaps strong feelings on the topic of astrology. I do not believe in it, do not read my daily horoscope, or really ever pay any attention to it. But from a personality standpoint, oftentimes it is dead on.  I have rarely held a job for longer than a year. And the few that I have had for longer than that, have been just one of many jobs I have worked during that time. I changed my major four times in college. I change my mind like the wind changes and I have as many interests as there are colors.  I have always had this restlessness. unfortunately, I have not always had a name for it or known how to deal with it. And I am sure that there are many people in my life who have been hurt at one point or another by this part of me. Not that I do it on purpose, but I am sure my inability to sit still, settle down, or relax has stepped on someone’s toes.  It is probably why I have had so many relationships that have ended poorly, why roommate situations never worked out quite right, and why the longest friend I have had is almost 10 years my elder.  I just get bored. And restless. And people take it personally.  But usually I am not bored with them, usually I am just restless. So yesterday I ran across this on my Twitter.
     
    A #Sagittarius needs to recognize that their eternal restlessness is a personal issue, not a relationship issue.
     
    As I read about that, I thought about where I am. My soul is restless; perhaps even anxious. But for what reason, I cannot explain. I love my job, I am so thankful for my friends, and living in southern Indiana is not all bad. In fact, the leaves are starting to change and its starting to feel like fall.  I think though, that my soul is not restless because of circumstances. You could put me anywhere, change everything, and I will still feel the same. So why the restlessness?
     
    I think it is just who I am. I think it is why I can work two jobs, go to school, run, hang out with my friends, and still find time to do a myriad of other things. I think it is why I spare time researching ways to fight human trafficking, am so interested in social justice, and so passionately care about those issues.  I know it is why I am sometimes difficult to get along with and even more difficult to understand. Because my restlessness is not about relationships, it’s just part of who I am. It has nothing to do with what I am doing, who I spend my time with, or even the geographical location I am living. And it probably is not going to change. I think I will always be a restless, wanderer at heart.  It does not mean I will always wander, it just means I will always find something to do, a cause to support, or a race to run.   It is who I am. And as I get older, I am finding ways to handle it better than packing up and moving, bailing on relationships, or quitting. I am learning to use the restlessness for good, to accomplish more, do more, and love more.